Pain junkie

Happy 1st Anniversary of my breast reduction!

In thinking of a nifty way to celebrate my smaller version of myself, I thought it would be great to go in today and get a scar revision done, and wouldn't it be *just* fabulous that it's the actual anniversary date? I mean, really, I've gone 8 whole weeks without some sort of bandaging attached to me in some way or another, and that is just entirely too long. I think that I must have reached some magical threshold of feeling 'ok' that sends a signal to my brain that I need to cause myself more pain. So, why not call up the plastic surgeon and ask for a few stitches? Yes, WHY not??

So it has been a few hours since my procedure, and my local has worn off. I have bloody bandaging, plus pain and royal discomfort. A bonafide pain junkie trifecta!! If you have ever had serious surgical sutures, you most likely have experienced the 'dog ears' that form on each end as they heal. It is triangular-shaped pucker that looks a bit odd. With my breast reduction surgery, one side looked pretty bad in addition to significant scarring, and the other side was not so noticeable but still bothersome. I could have had the revision done as early as 6 months ago but I opted to wait it out a few more months to see if the one side would resolve itself. They did change a significant amount so I am glad that I waited, but it wasn't enough to make me feel like it wouldn't keep bothering me for years on end. So I made the appointment to just get it done and over with. Now I am back to walking around with my arms pinned down to my sides, not reaching for anything, and driving using only the bottom 1/3 of the steering wheel. That was my life for a solid four months just a short time ago, and the disturbingly familiar pain is no fun at all.

I think I am really, really ready to be done with all of this surgery and recovery business. Really. I have a damn surgical shelf in the medicine cabinet that I just want to clear out. Bandaging, non-stick gauze, paper tape, scar cream, elastic wrap, arm splints (2), knee splints (3), compression wrap, blah, blah, blah...

Anyway, happy anniversary to me. It's still the best thing I ever did for myself.

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