A reflection on Calvert

I'm free!!!

The past few weeks have been pretty hairy.  It was an absolute fight to the finish to get Calvert wrapped up for the year.  I have been keeping mum about Calvert because...well... it's complicated.  It is a sorta-like/hate relationship.  It is everything I despise about one-size-fits-all education, yet it's everything I like about keeping myself accountable and on track.  Which I did a HORRIBLE job at this year.  I can't drag three children, kicking and screaming all the way, on this road to intellectual enlightenment (ha!) if they continuously misplace their books, can never find their pencils, and not get the big picture of what this is all for in the first place.

What we did accomplish this year:

Jordan learned to take notes.  I learned that it is a good idea for me to teach the skill of note-taking.  He learned that turning in late assignments affects your grade.  I learned that I hate having to scan in assignments at 11:59 pm to make the midnight deadline.  He learned that writing isn't so bad.  In fact, Jordan realized that he loved writing.  I learned that Jordan had actually been listening to me for the past eight years every time we approached writing, composition, grammar and so forth - because his 'voice' in his writing is fantastic and he really knows how to construct a good sentence.  Sentence diagramming is difficult and makes us both tear our hair out.  (The geek in me though secretly loves it). NaNoWriMo, assigned by his Calvert teacher, was especially helpful in drawing out his writing voice.  Writing a short story was something I would never in a million years have asked him to do, and yet it was because of Calvert that we both made this discovery!   He learned algebra.  I learned that I still remember algebra. (happy dance)  Jordan learned how to type faster.  falls out of chair laughing.  He went from 25 wpm to an astounding 29 wpm! Jordan earned his 8th grade diploma, and will be moving on to public high school next year.

Rylan learned that dropping your pencil on the floor 518,397 times a day does not get you out of your schoolwork.  She learned how to spell 'people' and 'because'.  Rylan learned multiplication, just don't ask her to do it at anytime other than when she is in the mood.  Which is never.  Rylan learned to contort her body into 37 different pretzel shapes while sitting in her chair, all of which face away from the desk, and coincidentally, away from her schoolwork.  Rylan read two novels this year - and has quite the reading pile for the summer.  She also took an avid interest in ASL, after reading a short story in her reading anthology about a deaf boy going to a concert.  I may need to pursue this for her.  Rylan loved her online teacher and her classmates, so she wants to do this all over again next year.  The social bits, of course.  NOT the schoolwork.  

Owen learned to read.  This accomplishment alone is what kept me going through the darkest of schooling hours this year.  Several times in the past couple of weeks, he has read signs around town, carefully sounding things out.  This makes my heart sing.  He loves his online teacher, his class, and anything to do with math.  He has learned to like holding a pencil, and writing with it.  (just a little).  He loves to draw and paint.  He is more than willing to sit down and do schoolwork, as long as it doesn't interfere with his Minecraft or lego building time.  Which is never.  Which is why I can't ever get him to work with me for longer than 2 minutes without a fight.

This year has been full of tears, lots of yelling on everyone's parts, lots of high-fives, cajoling, swearing (under my breath), deal-making, begging, pleading, a-ha moments... unfortunately the bad is far out-weighing the good.  It's partly the program and partly me.  I've been lax, lazy, disinterested, and fighting my own battles.  The spillover has not been pretty.  Some serious soul-searching needs to take place this summer about what the next step will be.

All I know is that this is not how I envisioned how our homeschool experience would go.  Eight years into this journey, my (our) primary purpose has always been and always will be to put childhood first.  Play (and not the screen type) has as much - if not more importance in shaping a child's mind, than worksheets, descriptive paragraphs and addition problems.  I don't like the complicated, regimented, competitive and petty environment of public schools - in the younger grades, especially.  At the high school level, these social stepladders do have *some* merit, I suppose, when it comes to beginning to discover who you are and what you are made of.  I also know that these lessons don't only happen within the confines of a classroom.

The work Calvert requires of the kids is not inspiring, with the exception of Jordan's reading curriculum.  Hands down, that was fabulous stuff that has helped us cover so much literary knowledge this year.  Otherwise, the caliber of the rest of the curriculum is... meh.  I am pretty disappointed, actually.  It was actually painful to shelve all of our tried-and-true stuff last year when it came time to unbox the Calvert books after they arrived.  Throughout the entire school year I constantly found myself referring back to our other curriculum for this and that, because it was just so much better.  I am confident in Jordan's abilities because of what we used in the past.  Jordan has been the model student all these years, as we have traveled this homeschooling route.  He's done the work when asked and without question, and performs very well when the time comes to assess his knowledge and skills.  The younger three kids have so many issues I don't even know where to begin.  In reflecting on their behavior this past year, a lot of it comes down to a sense of entitlement that they have.  They feel that they are entitled to their free time, so schoolwork has become a secondary, painful experience for them - and having very boring, worksheet-style learning as the primary source of instruction is NOT helping that situation.

So I have a lot of thinking to do.  I'm doing some major decompressing at the moment, which is good for me.  Our calendar is completely blank, with the exception of a weekly violin lessons and the occasional field trip.  I'm not even having the kids do swim lessons.  I can tell I am feeling more than a little shell-shocked from the stress of this school year.  This is a huge sign for me that maaaaaybe Calvert isn't the best fit for us.

You say Tomato, I say Pomodoro

I give myself one Pomodoro to get this blog post written...

(yeah, right... now try to convince the perfectionist within....)

This is a follow up to yesterday's musing about Rylan and ADHD.  Okay 'musing' sounds a little lighthearted... how about doomsday prophecy? 

My mother presented Dean and I with the most awesome gift of *time* (ie. - a date!) last night, so we headed out for a quick dinner.  It is so nice to be able to have serious parenting conversations without kids around...

(instead of hearing, "Whatcha talkin' about?" 38 times in a five-minute time span.)

It's also polite to actually include the other parent in conversations that you have with yourself (and your 3 or 4 adoring fans) about your children and any medical diagnosis that you may bestow upon them.

Dean actually has a lot to say on this subject - as well he should, since he is 50% responsible for the genetic crapshoot that eventually became our beloved child.  His genes won this round though, in the ADD department.  As he said last night, to look on the bright side, we've got the advantage that we have lots of experience on how to live with ADD/ADHD.  True.  So, let's talk about what that experience has taught us, and where to go from here.  Most of the conversation from here on out are Dean's thoughts as they came at me rapid fire on the drive home from the restaurant...  I invited him to write a guest post and he declined.  He said he was just 'in the moment', and by the next morning (right now) he would be on some other tangent.  So true.  So ADD.  :)

1.  Going for the diagnosis.  Most parents don't realize there is a problem until the child enters school.  (Timmy has always been an 'active' child... just wait until he is required to sit at a desk for six hours a day!)  It is true that the average age that a child is diagnosed is getting younger and younger.  How do you separate the normal immature, childish exuberance of a six year old from a serious psychological issue?  The most qualified medical professional to make the call is a child psychiatrist.  Don't take this issue to the pediatrician (like we did with Jordan).  There is just too much at stake, and if you are going to take a serious step and use medication, it's best to work with someone who really knows all of the different manifestations of ADD/ADHD, and the best meds to regulate them.

Paperwork.  The psychiatrist will ask for documentation - from teachers, family members, counselors...  One of the best things you can do is keep a symptom journal.  (Something I am going to start immediately).  Write down the behaviors you see, the times that they occur, the environment that they occurred in, etc... Also comment on diet and sleep.

2.  Regulate the environmental distractions.  This is so hard for me, and also why we don't send the kids to public school.  Since the presence of the two younger children are distracting to both Jordan and Rylan when they are doing schoolwork, I have to keep them separated as much as possible.  This year that will be even more difficult, when I also need to squeeze in preschool work time with Owen.  Colin is by far the biggest concern.  He is the younger version of Jordan - he is the extrovert, and hates to be alone.

No tv during school time, and music sometimes helps, and other times it is a hindrance.  Soft piano or jazz seems to work best.  If using music with lyrics, make it something the child knows well.  If it is new, it will activate the portion of the brain that reacts to any 'new' stimulus in the environment (SQUIRREL!!), and distract from the work at hand.  Dean, Jordan and Rylan all have a severe 'squirrel response'.

This also means that for this coming year (although we school year-round so it feels silly to say that) we need to set up more permanent separate work environments for both Jordan and Rylan.  We'll have to set up a desk in our bedroom for Jordan, and Rylan already has a nice little table and chairs in her room.  This doesn't mean that I send them up to their rooms with stacks of workbooks and tell them I'll see them in a few hours.  It just means that when we reach an independent work item, they have a quiet, distraction-free zone to work in.

3.  The Pomodoro Technique.  (go ahead and follow the link now, so that you know what I am talking about...)  I came across this a couple of years ago and showed it to Dean.  He now employs it regularly at work to help him stay focused, and he reports that it is pretty effective.  I use a modified technique at home, part of the Fly Lady system, just in a shorter time increment.  If I ever experience the miracle of a 25 consecutive minute stretch of uninterrupted work time, people would lay down their weapons and their Bibles and there would be World Peace.

So how do you use this technique with kids?  Dean's idea was to send the child, with their ability-appropriate assignment, off to their workspace to get it done.  Give them a goal.  For Jordan, it would be 'finish these two pages (within a particular time frame), then come find me so we can go over it'.  For Rylan, it would be more like 'do these two problems', then come find me.  Then we can check off their work. 

4.  Reminder lists/schedule.  The older two already have a laminated day-of-the-week card that lists out all of their commission-related chores (tied to their weekly allowance) and daily schoolwork, with places to designate if they did it, and how long they spent.  These cards let me tally their commissions earned, and the actual time spent on schoolwork.  One of these days I'll get around to actually posting more in detail about it.  (Soon!  I promise!)  But here is a photo of one of these cards from this past week so you know what I am talking about..

It is important to give the ADD/ADHD child a way to document their work (successes).  Number one, they often hear more negative messages than positive ones about their (in)ability to stay on task and get something done.  They need a way to measure progress.  How will a child ever learn to self-manage if they don't have any sort of benchmark system?  The child can see that they got two problems done... and it took them six minutes of work time.  Next time around (knowing that they are capable) they can make it a goal to get three problems done within that time...or whatever.

It is also important to help an ADD/ADHD child manage time.  They can't self-regulate, and schedules help immensely.  A list to refer to - no matter how detailed - will help them feel less scattered and overwhelmed.  It also helps the child that always wants to know "What's next?"  Keeping a family calendar will also settle the question, "What are we doing today?", without you having to answer it on an hourly basis.  They can SEE the answer for themselves.

5.  Predictable routine.  This is the hardest one for me.  My daily energy and mood is so up and down that I can't keep things consistant.  And then you throw five other personalities into the mix and then all bets are off.  We try.  We really, really try.  But so far we have totally missed the mark on this one.  At least we know what to strive for - but meal times, bed times, school times, nap times, chore times and shopping times all vary...on a daily basis.  Right now we are a spur-of-the-moment kind of family, and this really does not work well for us... Sigh.

 

Okay, I have now gone through three Pomodoros... the last two of which were interrupted by small children requesting juice, something to eat, and something interesting to watch on tv.  Something NOT Olympics related. 

See what I am up against?

Singing the praises of Kahn Academy



School is as intermittent as ever in our house... I am still searching for that elusive balance of schoolwork/cleaning/activities/fun.  It seems that activities (actually the driving to and from) always wins.

The bulk of our school time has been relegated to the middle of the afternoon, while the little boys are napping.  This is not our best time of day.  It's actually the worst.  We try for mornings, but schtuff always seems to foul up any momentum we get going.  Jordan has taken to doing a lot of his workbook-type stuff in our bedroom, spreading out on our bed.  I don't blame him.  It's quiet and the little kids don't bother him nearly as much.  I will pass through as I am shuffling laundry around, and he will read off Q&A's to me, we discuss and move on to next thing.  It's hardly optimal, but we're getting the job done.

Math, however is an entirely different matter.  I am locked in with MEP math.  I have a love/hate relationship with it, but I think it is the best out there.  No other curriculum spurs as much discussion (and at times frustration) as MEP.  The lengths that we go to work through the theory and logic of the problems presented is quite extreme at times, but Jordan will not quit until he solves whatever it is he is working on.  We have stretched a single lesson over 2-3 days at times, but we get there.  Jordan is eleven and technically in the 6th grade.  He is currently on Year 5, Lesson 56.  There are 175 lessons per 'Year'.  The program goes through Year 6.  Rylan is working through Year 1 and is on Lesson 28.  I started her in the Reception Year in June, and quickly dropped it and just moved on to Year 1.  I should have started her much earlier.  I am thinking that the 'Year' is advanced by one, when you line it up (skills wise) to the US grade level system.  So, with Jordan doing Year 5 work, I think it lines up pretty well with what a 6th grader would be doing.

Jordan is currently working with negative numbers, absolute value and adding/subtracting positive and negative numbers.  The previous topic was surface area and volume.  By the final 2-3 lessons on that topic things were starting to click, but prior to that, those were the days we were at it for 2 hours or more (with lots of breaks) to get it done.  Sigh.  The current topic?  Done in 20 min.  I am so glad he is having success with this - I hope it boosts his confidence - he is going to need it in the coming years.  He struggles when things move beyond two-dimensional.  So do I, for that matter.  When he is learning advanced Algebra, I will be there right along with him, learning as well.

Back to math... So, even though I was introduced Kahn Academy a long, long time ago (don't remember how or when, but I imagine is was a link that someone in our homeschool group posted at some point), I never really explored it beyond a 5 minute cursory overview, saved the link, and then promptly forgot about it.  It took the urging of my husband to get me to go back and really look.  Wow!  What a great tool - and it takes some of the pressure off of me.  I don't want 'my way' to be the only way that Jordan learns how to solve a problem.  MEP does an excellent job of presenting multiple ways to solve a problem, but that is only if I can correctly disseminate to Jordan what they are trying to do.  Quite frankly, because the program was originally Hungarian, translated into English and the piloted in English grammar schools, some of the methods are absolutely foreign (no pun intended) to me.  That is actually what I LIKE about this program!  Americans are stuck in a rut about there is only ONE way to solve a problem, and that solving multiplication problems the way our grandparents did should be good enough.  It's not.  Anyway, I digress.   Again.

Kahn academy saved the day last week when it came to explaining the proper way to do a permutation - I couldn't even find the proper video at first because I was looking under the wrong heading- it is listed under the Algebra 1 heading - which just about gave me a heart attack.  I'm not ready for this!!!  That question didn't even come from a MEP lesson - it came from a Problem Solving review question on his weekly Math's Mate review sheet.  He is currently working in the second book, the 'Red' book.  This is an Australian program that is an absolute bitch to get a hold of, if you are a homeschooler.  My nephews use it in their public middle school down in Broomfield, CO., and when I flipped through it, I knew I had to have it for Jordan.  I contacted the one and only US distributor, who happens to live just outside of Denver, and he is an old curmudgeon who doesn't want to sell single copies to homeschoolers.  There are 8 levels of workbooks or so, and he will only sell me one or two at a time, so I have to beg and borrow and lie about twice a year in order to get the next book we need. I told him that if he would just sell me the entire set, he could be done with me, but he won't budge.  So I call him every few months, and we get along fabulously.  not.  My SIL (a teacher) has access to the workbooks the district purchases, so she may be my resource for the remaining 5 books I need.  They are thought-provoking and TOUGH for some of the problems, and an overall good review to keep a variety of math concepts fresh.  Jeez.. look at me.  I digressed again!

So we watched a video about how to correctly go about doing a permutation.  I love, love, love the simple, straightforward approach that Salman Kahn takes as he presents the topic.  It isn't rushed, but it is short and sweet and to the point.  Dean and I are set up as 'coaches' and Jordan has a log-in so that he can go on there and work through all sorts of different review problems and earn points for doing so.  The site has now become the carrot at the end of the math lesson.  Jordan watches a video or two about the topic we covered in the lesson, and then works on earning points by doing review problems.  He loves it - which I am totally in awe over.  I hope that with all of this review, Jordan will finally master his times tables.  The kid can work a number line forwards and backwards, but ask him what 3 times 4 is and all you get is 'huh?'.

The Rabbit Hole...

This is an 'off' week (a week we don't "do school"), so I have been spending an obscene amount of time catching up with my favorite blogs.  In doing so, I added 15  (**15!!**) more blogs to my favorites list.  Geez.  No wonder I never get anything done.  Anyway... I got a lot of great ideas...

Muffin Tin Monday

Ever heard of this??  I had seen/heard of using a muffin tin to serve lunch to toddlers.  You filled all of the cups (using very small portion sizes) with foods from all of the different food groups, and then let your child 'graze' over the tin, sampling here and there.  The idea was that they ended up eating more than they likely would otherwise, and it would end up being a pretty balance meal.  Intriguing theory... 

Well, the over-achieving, too-much-time-on-their-hands Bento Box crowd got wind of this and just went nuts!  Now there are entire blogs DEVOTED to this little foodie art form.  Yeah for voyeurs like me who have run out of ideas on what to serve their kids.  Just take a look....  Muffin Tin Mom has the most amazing and creative ideas - and touts the creation of the idea, so this is where the credit is due.  I don't know if I can copy any of her pictures, so go take a look.  Now.  I'll wait!  Wow - see what I mean?  I feel so inadequate.  Sugary Flower has the prettiest web page I have ever seen!  Her ideas are amazing as well - and all of her other baked goods just make you swoon.  Bonus that she is an Aussie.

So here is my feeble attempt that I made on Monday...



Clockwise: Cinnamon applesauce, corn, dinosaur nuggets, grape jelly sandwiches, yellow bell pepper, ketchup

This is Owen's 'before' shot.  I picked up the silicone baking cups (6 yellow and 6 pink) at Hobby Lobby earlier in the morning.  They were on clearance for $3.99.  woo-hoo!

'After' shot.  Notice that they are in a stack.  As Owen finished with each cup (one at a time - he eats just like me!!), he added to the stack.  OCD I tell you....

Rylan's 'before'...

And her 'after'.  She had three helpings... which was kind of a pain because I had to keep refilling the cups, but she ate more than she ever typically does at lunch time, which is a very good thing.

The upside: the kids eat!!!  I don't waste any of the "extras" when I use the tiny cutters - Colin just gets the scraps, cut into smaller pieces.
The downside: add another half-hour to meal-prep time, and raise the expectation that we need to eat EVERY meal this way!  I think just doing it 2-3 times a week is fine with me!

Review Box

We use All About Spelling in these here parts.  Part of the system is the review box.  This homeschooling mom had an excellent alternative/extended use for this system.





Ohhh... this has my wheels turning... just think of the possibilities.  I wish I could make a beeline to Office Max right now.  The organizer in me says, "Yes!  Yes!"  The reality maven says 'What are you kidding me???  Review??  Why don't you actually COMPLETE a lesson and then we'll talk".  Sigh.

Just putting this post together and going through and linking everything took an additional hour of time (because I found even more stuff to look at) I don't really have.  See what I mean about a Rabbit Hole??  Happy wandering!

Barometer Soup

We have a cold weather front that is in the midst of moving through. I don't even have to look outside though, to confirm that. You can tell just by listening to the kids. I remember that during my public school teaching days, I hated days like this. The kids were always off kilter and it was a classroom management nightmare. So it is with homeschool. Here it is, four in the afternoon and I am done. Done, done, done. I don't care if the to-do list says I'm not, I'm saying I am. I sent Rylan to bed about 45 minutes ago, and Jordan is keeping Owen entertained in the playroom. Maybe my sanity will collect itself if I keep sitting here, writing. I even put on some soft, classical music (Bach) to smooth the edges. It's sorta working.

A major frustration of mine is that Jordan cannot stay on task to get his stuff done. In my ideal world I have scheduled for him about 4 hours worth of lessons/independent work each day (gotta make the education police happy...) and I swear we have not had a day yet (in 2 years!!), where we have completed EVERYTHING. Weirdly enough, science always gets the short shrift, even though that is Jordan's favorite subject. Each day, at about mid-afternoon, I reach my utter frustration point because there is still a mound of school work to slog through, and my own work load hasn't been attended to even in the slightest, save the load of laundry that was thrown in the wash before I came down to make breakfast. And there it sits, festering in the washing machine, long forgotten...

Well, I came up with an idea this afternoon, just after I escorted Rylan to her room for her nap (she wasn't exactly a willing party). I needed to spend some time in the kitchen to whip up some meringue for a pavlova tonight, and I thought to myself how nice it would be if the rest of the day were mine. I could get done what I needed to get done, without any guilt of what I should have been doing for/with Jordan. Several weeks ago, I made some changes to how we schedule our day. A fellow homeschooling mom gave me some advice (thanks Dalliss) about how she got her kids to do their daily chores. She posted a list for them to refer to so that they wouldn't be constantly in her hair. I took her advice to heart, and configured a list of my own. I had also been reading up on Rebecca Rupp's Home Learning Year by Year, to make a database for myself (to feed my quest for order in the midst of chaos) for what kinds of items we needed to address as far as Geography, World History, US History and Science goes. We have had such a spotty record for staying with a routine (having a baby in the midst of all of this did not help much) that I needed to get an idea of where exactly we were and where we needed to go. So, I came up with this.



We have had a good first run with this, but it needs some tweaking. "The List" seems to dominate the entire day. I added the 'Independent Work ' list for good reason: Jordan desperately needs to develop some self-management skills. He seems to do much better when he has the list to refer to and keep him on track. It also stresses the need for him to take some responsibility in his daily work. The months that passed between the final weeks of pregnancy and throughout Owen's infancy were left unstructured. Jordan (and Rylan for that matter) was pretty much left to his own devices about what he would learn and when. I guess you could say it was an experiment in unschooling. It did not go well, in Jordan's case. He would wander aimlessly about all day, and if he cracked open a book, it was a miracle. And it was not like interesting stuff wasn't dangled in front of him. We went to the library weekly. Yet all Jordan wanted to check out was Garfield comic books. He was not motivated to learn anything of consequence. All he wanted to do was to play video games, and I was not going to give in to that. Here we are about a year later, and Jordan has matured quite a bit. He will pick up his chapter book frequently (without being asked) and he will constantly rummage through the picture books (which is a complete library in it's own right...). We began to structure our days again around mid-January, and it has been better for all of us, ever since. Since the inception of this schedule, it has removed much of the burden from me of seeing to it that Jordan is on task and trying to remember what else it was that he should work on. It also meant that subjects like Earth Science wouldn't be shelved for weeks on end. We have a different version for each day of the week (so that all subject areas are addressed over the course of a week), and each day has it's own rhythm. Each day has been printed out and housed in a plastic sleeve. We use a wet-erase pen to mark things off as we go - it just washes off at the end of the day.

Well - back to the thought of the day. My complaint is that the burden of completion falls squarely on my shoulders, when it really should belong to Jordan. My portion of the work, the 'Lessons' part, is my only sole responsibility. It can involve any number of things - demonstrating a skill, reading out loud, handling materials for an experiment, ect. . It is this box that is continually left undone, when it is (IMHO) actually the most important box as far as keeping up with the knowledge base we should be continually building. It occurred to me today that I should enforce a time limit on this box in order to preserve a portion of the day for me that is 'lesson free'. If I say that it needs to be done by 3 pm, then I can ensure that my part is done, and I can go about my business for the rest of the day. It stands to reason that we should make good use of the portion of the day that Owen will take a reliable nap. Since Owen will typically nap from 11am - 2ish, that is the best time frame within to work in our lessons. Addressing the subject of History (World & U.S.) during lunch time works especially well, because we can read & discuss while I am making lunch. Our world map also makes for a nice 'tablecloth'. One fun game is toss a spoonful of peas across the map and see how many different countries you can land a pea on...

I admit it may sound like over-the-top authoritarianism, but structure is what holds the tears/frustration at bay in our home. Jordan's ADHD is very difficult to manage (at times). I have done my best to come up with solutions that we can all live with. We opted for homeschooling because of all of the problems that the ADHD behaviors presented in the classroom. The most frustrating of which is impulsivity and high-distractability. Having a schedule to refer to helps to suppress some of the impulse to get up and mess around. Some days though (like today) are absolutely impossible, no matter what tools are in place. Sigh.