The Sadist with a Syringe...

 

My right shoulder hurts.  It. hurts. a. lot.  So much so, that I am forced to take desperate measures.  Like, take ibuprofen and stuff.  And go to a physical therapist.  I'm not a fan of popping pills.  (well, besides the anti-depressants).  I don't like masking pain because then I do stupid heroic stuff.  Like help the home-renovation effort by ripping out the carpet in a room and all of the tacking strips.  Then I lay around and cry on the couch for the next two days because it hurts too much to do ANYTHING.  So, I'm not a big fan of pain, but I am even less of a fan of hiding it instead of figuring out what is causing it.

 

So, today I went to see the Sports Medicine Guy at my regular doctor's office because I don't know what else to do..

 

Here is my history -

 

* the pain sort of started last July.  It was mostly a deep chest pain on the right side, level with my arm pit, my heart was racing at times and numbness radiated down my arm.  It was the wrong side, but I thought maybe I was having a serious cardiac issue.

 

* I went to see my GP.  She ordered an EKG, chest x-ray and a blood test.  Nothing.

 

* I wore a heart monitor for two weeks.  Nothing.

 

* The racing stopped, the squeezing sensation gradually went away (we think it was a stress response), but the pain did not go away.  A few days here and there I felt perfectly normal, but there would always be 'a point' where a shock of pain would get my attention whenever I did a certain movement.

 

* Over the past several months, that pain has increased and the range of motion has decreased.  It's gotten other muscles involved, and now my entire right rotator cuff, pectoral area and shoulder blade and bicep are involved.  I am right-handed, so ANYTHING I do hurts.  Lift a full glass of water?  Agony.  Reach for a box of muffin mix and toss it in the grocery cart?  It brings me to my knees.  Lift down the bottle of laundry detergent?  Better grab your ear plugs..  Lift my arm to press the garage door opener in the car?  Groan and close my eyes.  Walk and swing my arms?  Not happening.  Pull the comforter over me when I get in bed?  A little scream might eek out.

 

And yet life has to go on..

Laundry

Dishes

Lifting the three yr. old

Shopping

Books

Typing

Shampoo

Getting dressed

 

* I finally consented to physical therapy.  I've had seven appointments in the past four weeks.  Nothing.  But now I have incredible tenderness under my arm... is there a life-changing tumor growing and I don't know it???  (Lots of sleep lost over the past few weeks about that...)

 

* I went back to the GP a couple of days ago.  Shoulder x-rays.  Nothing.  But nothing is good because it means there is no life-changing tumor lurking under there.  Nothing is bad because there is still no explanation for the pain and loss of strength and mobility.

 

* GP says see the Sports Medicine Guy.  Maybe he will order an MRI.  A tear in the rotator cuff could explain a lot of things.  This could be good.  Surgery could fix things!

 

* Sports Medicine Guy pokes and prods, lifts, pushes and pulls.  Bursitis is mentioned.  Then he grabs an assistant.  And an evil-looking syringe.

 

* That evil syringe full of steroids that went into the back of my shoulder hurt so. damn. bad., I nearly cried...and choked back the urge to throw up.  Ten hours later it feels no better.  In fact, I feel like my right arm is absolutely useless.  So I'll type a bit and bitch a bit and maybe that will make me feel better.

 

Nope.

 

Nothing.